Monday, February 3, 2014
I am very supportive of my friends. I totally believe in my friend's ability to conquer any goal they set for themselves. With so many of my friends spread around the country (world), this usually means texts, Facebook likes/comments, blog comments, cards, emails, etc. If a friend sets a goal, I'm all over helping them stop the negative talk and bolstering up their confidence to achieve it.
Oddly enough (or maybe not so odd), I am the complete opposite when it comes to me and my goals. I set them, then become my own worst bully. "You can't do that." "You're too fat to look good." "You're too slow to run that race." "Your friends don't really like you, you're just convenient." "You're not as smart as you think you are." Yea. These are all thoughts that have gone through my head.
I have a hard time reconciling the person I am for my friends and the person I am for myself. I need to work on being the same person to me as I am for them. I don't think I keep myself to a higher standard than I do my friends. I honestly believe that my friends can achieve anything they set their minds to. They are a font of possibilities, but me? Not so much. I don't have whatever it is they have. I believe they are better than me.
This has to stop. I am just as capable as they are. I have the same innate abilities that allow them to reach their goals. My goals may be different, but I have the skills and knowledge to reach them. I need to stop the negative talk and start the positive. It won't be easy being it's been part of my being for 35+ years, but it's possible. I've overcome other things I didn't think I could do and believe it or not I did them - earning a Master's degree, running (yes, just running!), changing careers. Those are pretty big things. If I can do those, I can change my mental attitude, right?
Do you have a negative mental self-talk? How do you stop it and find a way to be positive?