Today, I saw two separate posts from bloggers I follow and admire share their struggle with negative self-image/talk. Lauren at Breathe Deeply and Smile broke down her weekend and how her mind immediately went to the negative when things didn't go as well as she planned. I like that she was able to see what she should have thought based on a look at the facts.
Ann at Ann's Running Commentary talked about how she sees herself as fat even when the photographic evidence proves otherwise. That no matter what her size, no matter what people say she sees herself as fat. This woman has run a marathon and an Ironman! She fell on a trail race multiple times, sprained her ankle, ripped up her knees, and a dislocated finger.
I hate that women that I consider strong, talented, and inspirational go through negative self-talk. Why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we allow society to determine our worth rather basing it on our accomplishments and abilities?
Lately, I've been thinking of the card my Grandparents gave me when I graduated college. A little back ground for the newer readers, my father passed away when I was 13 in 1988 and I graduated college in 1998. In essence the card said they were so proud of me for graduating college and overcoming losing my father. It struck me as odd because I never thought I was overcoming anything. I just lived my life, doing what I thought was best albeit without my dad, who I wished with all my heart had been there.
It's strange how others see our accomplishments versus how we see them. I share that story because it's the one time in my life where I did what I knew I was capable of but others saw it as outstanding. I've been thinking about this because I have been doubting my abilities, my goals, my place in life. Maybe I need to go back to just thinking it's the way my life is rather than something I'm striving for.
Go check out Lauren and Ann's posts. They are worth the visit.
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Thanks so much for the mention and the great thought. It was such an accomplishment and such a huge loss. I am glad your grandparents pointed that out to you.
ReplyDeleteYou're welcome Ann. You are an amazing person and hate that you think this about yourself.
DeleteMy grandparents are amazing people. I was surprised that to them it was an accomplishment and they told me that. Not something I thought about. Everyone should be lucky enough to have grandparents as special as mine.
Agree, it's so much easier to criticize yourself than feel proud about yourself. Not sure where this comes from, especially since we say/think things about ourselves that we would never say or think about our friends. In those moments I try to imagine I would talk to myself like I would talk to a friend and it helps, this way I'm much "nicer".
ReplyDeleteThat's what I want to get better at - talk to myself as I would a friend. If a friend was down on themselves about not following the food choices they wanted to, I would say, "but you can now. You can start following them today and move on." When I don't follow my plan, it's an indictment of my personality, mentality, abilities. I need to be more like I am to my friends.
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